So I’m sitting in what would normally be my physics period today, doing review for the science standardized test (thank you, No Child Left Behind) bribing one of my friends to shank me in the forehead with her ballpoint pen so that I don’t die the slow and painful death of listening to a decrepit burned-out science teacher review the most basic elements of Chemistry (haha..sorry, bad pun. Moving along…) No way, Mr. Carrier. No fucking way. You mean, Hydrogen has the lowest atomic mass out of the elements? What? NO WAY! GTFO! That’s crazytalk. Yeah, it was a snarky 80 minutes.
Anyways, about 30 minutes into this mind-numbing educational experience, I happen to notice that I have 3 bars of reception on my phone. Our school is built like frickin’ Fort Knox, getting cell reception is a rarity. Three bars? Now that’s crazytalk. Cece and I decide to take full advantage of this fact. Being fairly well-acquainted with a good third of the class and having their cell phone numbers helped. While most of my friends got the chemistry presentation misconstrued as sexual innuendo via text, just about everyone who was in that class, who had a cell phone number that I knew got the following text…
“I just wanted to let everyone know… I’m fucking Matt Damon.”
Now, I was of course, alluding to the video seen below. A surprisingly small number of people knew what I was talking about. A few texted back “Wait, you are Matt Damon?” or “You bump uglies with Matt Damon?” a personal favorite: “Or Jude Law. Maybe.” “Can I join in?”
Anyhoo, here’s the video..
